"Imbeeyah"

We've made a prayer chain for Daddy while he's in "Imbeeyah". There's a link for each night he's gone with Bible verses that we can pray. When we get to the heart at the top that says "Daddy's Home!", it will be time for him to be back.

Jonah wanted to write "Daddy" all by himself. Not bad for a three-year-old but I'm biased. I know for a fact there are others in his class at preschool that could do way better. They're also girls, but you know....

Last night, while we were praying Ephesians 4 for Daddy (specifically verses 4 and 15) Jonah asked if we could tear off two links.
     "I want Daddy to come home.....now."
I know, Buddy. Me too.

After he went to bed, I was finishing up my lesson for BSF and kept getting hung up on one particular question. The lesson asked me to list promises from anywhere in the Bible that are encouraging me at the current time. There are so many! Where do I even start?! I was thinking about in John 17 when Jesus prays for His disciples and asks God to keep them safe by the Name He gave Christ. I tried to turn there but for some reason my mind kept thinking that "sheep" was in that passage and I know the sheep passage is in John 10 so that's where I ended up. Of course, that's exactly where God wanted me.

"I have other sheep that are not of this sheep pen. I must bring them also. They too will listen to my voice, and there shall be one flock and one shepherd." John 10:16

Suddenly, my prayer turned from "Keep Bear safe, keep Bear safe!" to "Get those sheep, get those sheep!" Strange how God just turned my perspective around, isn't it? It's not about my fear, worry, and loneliness. It's all about Him and His glory. Always has.

So, Babe- wherever you are in "Imbeeyah"....get those sheep!

Brown, Green, or Yellow?

Today is my last day of fasting. I began on January 11 as our entire church family began a fast to seek God's face in 2011. The purpose? To ask Him to do the unexplainable. To see an 11 on a scale of 1-10. I chose to abstain from anything sweet/sugary and all caffeine. This includes my morning "Halle Berry", an affectionate name coined by my friend Stephanie for the way I drink my coffee. (It matches Halle's skintone perfectly. Light and sweet. Basically, I drink coffee as a means to ingest creamer.) I was going to post earlier last week about my fasting but I didn't want to be like those Jesus described in Matthew 6 and wanted this to be all about Him and not me. Bear chose to fast from food.You read that right. Today is his 11th day without any type of food whatsoever. He's just drinking water and V8 Splash. For 11 days. Is it no coincidence that Becky is doing a blog post series on marriage? I think not. ;)

I'm personally seeking God's answer regarding areas of service & ministry. Have I had any profound answer? Not really. I'm still exactly where I was 11 days ago. We were talking about this in our adult small group meeting last Thursday. One of the members said that if you look in the Bible at fasting, God usually answers after the fast. The fast is our complete and total obedience to Him and only after we're fully obedient does He bless it. Makes sense, right?

Today has caused me to reflect upon this whole fasting ordeal and I'm pretty ashamed to admit that I don't think I did it right. I know all about fasting but I've never actually done it before. Bear & I cut things out of our lives all the time in order to seek God's face more diligently. I guess you could call that fasting but food has never been a choice for me. I love it too much. Should've been my first clue, right?

Jonah has a little car that he plays with in the bathtub. It's hypercolor & changes colors depending on if it's warm or cold, wet or dry.

When it's completely dry, it's brown.

When it's wet with cold water, it's green.

When it's in warm water, it turns yellow.

As he was playing in the tub this morning, I was wanting "Halle" more than anything. I began praying asking the Lord why haven't I gotten an answer yet? Will it be tomorrow? Will I even get one? He asked me, "Are you fasting on brown, green, or yellow?" I have been completely obedient with this fast. I haven't even had any salad dressings with sugar in them. In fact, we went to "Milk 'n Shake" (Steak & Shake) and I had water. I've been really good. But when those times come around 2:00 each day when I'm dragging & need a little boost, do I turn to the Word? No. I've been taking naps. I've been watching Netflix on the Wii. Again, coincidence that our Wii broke last night out of nowhere & has to be sent in for repairs? No. I haven't been brown. But I haven't been yellow either.

"For day after day they seek me out; they seem eager to know my ways, as if they were a nation that does what is right and has not forsaken the commands of its God. They ask me for just decisions and seem eager for God to come near them. ‘Why have we fasted,’ they say, ‘and you have not seen it? Why have we humbled ourselves, and you have not noticed?’ “Yet on the day of your fasting, you do as you please and exploit all your workers. Your fasting ends in quarreling and strife, and in striking each other with wicked fists. You cannot fast as you do today and expect your voice to be heard on high. Is this the kind of fast I have chosen, only a day for people to humble themselves? Is it only for bowing one’s head like a reed and for lying in sackcloth and ashes? Is that what you call a fast, a day acceptable to the LORD?" Isaiah 58:2-5 (emphasis mine)

So today, I repent & ask the Lord to forgive my feeble fasting attempt. I have learned several things from this fast which I plan on posting later but for just today, I desire forgiveness.

I wanted to find some synonyms for 'half-hearted' to include in this post. I was honestly looking for ones that started with an 'f' to be cute & alliterative to go with 'fasting'. Isn't that just like me? To make my sin seem not so offensive by cutesy-ing it up? Pitiful. I found these words:

Apathetic. Uenthusiastic. Lazy. Reluctant. Indifferent. Doubtful. Fearful. Fickle. Wavering. Wishy-washy. Careless. Lukewarm. Flat. Lifeless.

Not words that I want to describe my walk with Jesus. But perfect to describe my sinful self. I'm lazy in the mornings and don't get up like I should. I'm fearful of where He will lead me. (How silly is that?!) I'm fickle in my commitments. I'm reluctant to fully commit. I'm careless when it comes to my thoughts and actions. But the words that stopped me in my tracks was lukewarm, flat, and lifeless. Mainly because this is what Jesus says about those.

"I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth." Revelation 3:15-16

I literally make God sick to His stomach. He spits me up. Vomit.

But I'm so grateful there's Jesus! Because when my walk seems flat and lifeless, He's exactly where to turn!

“I am coming to you now, but I say these things while I am still in the world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them." John 17:13 (emphasis mine)

 "I am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved. They will come in and go out, and find pasture.  The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." John 10:9-10 (emphasis mine)

I'm so grateful that it's that simple. And that full.

Has anyone else fasted before? Did you get an answer? Was it what you were expecting? I'd love to hear about how God worked in your life!

You Annoint My Head With Oil

Just wrote this to a friend & as I was typing this, I couldn't help but think of Andy and tomorrow. It's not my own words. It's from a study I did a few years ago called "LORD, I Want to Know You" by Kay Arthur.

"Sheep can suffer greatly because of the nose fly. This is a fly that seeks to deposit its eggs on the mucus membrane of the sheep's nose. There the eggs hatch into small wormlike larvae that eventually work their way up the nose into the sheep's head. As these larvae burrow into the sheep's flesh, they cause a tremendous irritation, which in turn causes the sheep to thrash and beat its head against anything it can find. A sheep can become so driven to distraction by the irritation that it will actually kill itself in a desperate attempt to get rid of the source of aggravation.


As I learned this truth, I could not help but think of how men and women can be tormented by thoughts that burrow their way into their flesh. The eggs of torment are laid by the enemy and hatch into repulsive, destructive worms that work their way into their heads. Thoughts of fear, rejection, bitterness, hatred, failure, incompetency, sensuality, and greed plague God's sheep, tormenting them, even driving some to suicide. But is this to be the fate of God's sheep? No! Just as there is an oil the shepard can prepare to protect the sheep from nose flies and their destructive work, so our Shepard has a way to keep His sheep from such torment. As the psalmist says, "Thou annointest my head with oil" (Psalm 23:5, KJV)

What is the Shepard's oil of protection against pests that would attack our minds?

"For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." 2 Corinthians 10:3-5

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

Philippians 4:6-7

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you." Philippians 4:8-9

"You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you." Isaiah 26:3

Kay Arthur goes on to say:

"I want you to note one last truth. It is the end result of having the Lord as your Shepard:

"Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever. "

Psalm 26:3

Sisterhood of the Empty Quiver

Okay, I promised I'd elaborate on this past weekend's conference. I'm still struggling to find the adequate words. You just have to be there. I can tell you that God convicted me in a  special way. Of course, He always does when I'm faced with His Word.

Priscilla Shirer talked about King Jehoash in 2 Kings 13:10-19. Basically, the Assyrian army was coming and Israel was vastly outnumbered. He went to Elisha, the Prophet, for war advice. Elisha told him to take his bow and arrows and shoot them into the ground. King Jehoash only shot three arrows so Elisha told him that he would only defeat the Assyrians three times. If the king had completely emptied his quiver, then he would've had complete victory. However, he held on to some arrows for a Plan B option. Ah, there's my conviction.

I don't want to hold onto any of my arrows. I want to experience God completely. I don't want to just experience His safe side. I want the whole she-bang. (Or would that be He-bang?) I want to belong to the "Sisterhood of the Empty Quiver". I want to know that I've completely emptied myself before Him and that I'm completely obedient to His Plan...not my own.

"Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life[f] will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it. What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul? For the Son of Man is going to come in his Father’s glory with his angels, and then he will reward each person according to what they have done."
Matthew 16:24-27

You get out of God what you put in.. and I want to offer my whole self as a living sacrifice.

"Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." Romans 12:1-2

Please pray for clarity and wisdom as Bear and I search out what God has planned for us and wait on His perfect timing. Because whatever He's got in the works, I know it exceeds any plan I could put together and I'm already thanking Him for what He's going to do.

"LORD, you are my God; I will exalt you and praise your name, for in perfect faithfulness you have done wonderful things, things planned long ago." Isaiah 25:1

Here's a taste of what we experienced. (Pause my player at the bottom of the page so the music doesn't play over the video.) How are you going "deeper still" with our God? I'd love to hear how He's emptying your quiver. It would definitely further encourage me to do the same! Anybody want to go to Kentucky in June?

DeeperStill - Birmingham AL from Rich Kalonick on Vimeo.

The Shadow of a Cloud

I was in such a hurry yesterday to post pictures from our night last night that I didn't give God a chance to work. Just go ahead and call me Peter: quick to verbalize, slow to ponder. He's patiently teaching me what it meant when "Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart" (Luke 2:19). She probably didn't jump on her blog and start telling everyone how those shepards smelt to high heaven! Instead, she let God do a work in her and weave His truths in her heart to prepare her to raise such a special Son.

Well, God spoke this morning in my quiet time. In Isaiah 25, God is praised for His perfect faithfulness. And that's what He was last night. Perfectly faithful. He came in to our stormy time and softened both my heart and Bear's. Just like the shadow of a cloud, He covered us with His grace and tenderness. He was shade in the heat that comes from the pressure cooker of Christmas. He was refuge for me in my time of distress. I don't deserve His tender correction. I deserve hellfire and brimstone like Sodom & Gomorrah. Instead, he creeps in like the morning fog to wash those dirty places in my heart. He's so good. Perfectly faithful.

"LORD, you are my God; I will exalt you and praise your name, for in perfect faithfulness you have done wonderful things, things planned long ago. You have made the city a heap of rubble, the fortified town a ruin, the foreigners’ stronghold a city no more; it will never be rebuilt. Therefore strong peoples will honor you; cities of ruthless nations will revere you. You have been a refuge for the poor, a refuge for the needy in their distress, a shelter from the storm and a shade from the heat. For the breath of the ruthless is like a storm driving against a wall and like the heat of the desert. You silence the uproar of foreigners; as heat is reduced by the shadow of a cloud, so the song of the ruthless is stilled. On this mountain the LORD Almighty will prepare a feast of rich food for all peoples, a banquet of aged wine— the best of meats and the finest of wines. On this mountain he will destroy the shroud that enfolds all peoples, the sheet that covers all nations; he will swallow up death forever. The Sovereign LORD will wipe away the tears from all faces; he will remove his people’s disgrace from all the earth.

The LORD has spoken." Isaiah 25:1-8

On a completely different note, guess who's wanting to go to Deeper Still with Mommy?

Baby Girl, I promise one day when you're older, and if I still rank on the cool scale, we'll go sit at the feet of Jesus together!

A Silent Night

Don't you love it when God answers a prayer before you even know you need to pray it? That's where I find myself today. It's only December 1 and I'm already feeling the stress pressing down on me that comes with Christmas! Maybe because it's the last day that I will ever be in my twenties....yes, I turn THIRTY tomorrow. Maybe because Bear and I have already had about twenty tense conversations about Santa. Maybe because I haven't even started my Christmas shopping. Whatever it is, I need some intervention. I heard this song by Amy Grant and it spoke deep to my soul.

[Scroll down to the bottom of this page and pause my playlist so you won't hear two songs playing at once.]



God knew this would be my prayer way back in May and has already provided an answer! Isn't He amazing? I'm headed to Deeper Still 2010 in two days! Friday and Saturday with no kids, no laundry, no cooking- just me, my Bible, and my God. I CAN'T WAIT!!! Bear's taking me for my birthday along with my MOSM-I-L (Mean Old Step Mom-In-Law...don't worry, it's a joke between us. She's not mean or old!), my sister-in-law, and a friend from small group. Bear- you're a good man, Charlie Brown. I told him that if he wants me to, I'll buy him a pink t-shirt from the gift table. He said he'd try to refrain himself.

Beth Moore, Kay Arthur, and Priscilla Shirer- the Bible study Trifecta as far as I'm concerned- will be there AND as an added bonus, there will be an early morning devotion on Saturday by Kelly Minter. This summer, Toni (MOSM-I-L) and I did a study on Ruth by Kelly Minter and we couldn't be more beside ourselves. Ain't God good?!

Please pray for us as we travel to Birmingham, Alabama that we will have safe travels and that it will be a much needed time of spiritual refreshment, renewal, and reinforcement as we enter this Christmas season. Pray that God would grow me and that I return invigorated for all that He has planned for me. (I'll settle for keeping the laundry up to date!)

Please take just four minutes to listen. I promise it will speak to you too...unless all of your shopping is completed, your baking is done, and all you have to do the rest of this month is prop your feet up beside a warm cozy fire with a cup of coffee and read. Sigh. That sounds like heaven! Maybe after all that laundry....

Jonism: A Teenager at 3?

Sunday, we went to a climbing gym that Bear has found. Stephanie Cannon rode with me and the kids. We went for Mexican afterwards at this GREAT place. (Honestly, I went for the food.) On the way, there was chaos in the backseat because Esther Grace was hungry- heaven forbid the child not eat for at least an hour!- and Jonah couldn't hear his movie due to the fact that Esther Grace was having a moment. I stopped at a gas station and ran in to get some reinforcements while Steph stayed in the car with the kids. The following conversation ensued:

Stephanie: "Jonah, is everyone just in a bad mood today?"
Jonah, a bit indignantly: "No. That's not it."
Stephanie: "Well, what is it then?"
Jonah, with a sigh accompanied by an eyeroll and hands out in explanation: "It's just that kids just need their mommies to do what they're told and sometimes they just don't do it."
Stephanie, trying to stifle her sudden urge to lose it: "Why do you think that is, Jonah?"
Jonah, in complete exasperation: "Huhgh- it's just that mommies, they have things they need to do too."

When did we skip childhood and go straight to the teens?

At the climbing gym, I started thinking about what he said. God said to me, "Kristen, look at this from My perspective."

God: "Kristen, are you in a bad mood today?"
Kristen, indignantly: "No. That's not it."
God: "Well, what is it then? You can tell me. I made you. I know you. Trust me with your worries."
Kristen, with that know-it-all expression that He sees way too often: "It's just that I just want You to do what I need You to do and You just won't do it."
God, in complete undeserved patience: "My child, trust Me. I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you. My ways are higher than yours and they will be accomplished. Rest in that and have peace."
Kristen: "Okay, God. But could You hurry it up a bit?"

I am so glad that God is not contained by the pre-set boundaries I place on Him. Thank You, Lord for Your insights You so faithfully give me day-in and day-out. Keep teaching me. I may be in the remedial class but with a little tutoring, I'll get there!

"The LORD Almighty has sworn, “Surely, as I have planned, so it will be, and as I have purposed, so it will happen."...For the LORD Almighty has purposed, and who can thwart him? His hand is stretched out, and who can turn it back?" Isaiah 14:24, 27



Suit Up!

The firefighters came to Jonah's school to teach fire safety earlier this month. They ran through an obstacle course and got to see the lights on the truck. One fireman even dressed in his full gear to show the kids what firemen look like so in case they were ever in a fire, they wouldn't be scared by all the equipment. Jonah came home completely enthralled. This is what he's been wearing almost every day every since.

It's his firefighter equipment, complete with gas mask (lion nose), helmet (trick-or-treat rocket bag), and hose (cap gun). This cracks me up every time I see him in it. Then I got to thinking.....

How many times do I try to clothe myself one way with a vision in mind but get it completely wrong? In good times, I'll get to running with my own ideas and my own thoughts instead of waiting on the Lord and following His path. In bad times, I'll worry myself to death and get all in a tizzy instead of following God's prescribed order of dealing with a situation. Seek out His Word. Trust. Wait. Pray. He's given us everything we need and told us exactly what we should do and even what we should wear.

"Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm. Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth,

and having put on the breastplate of righteousness,

and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace.

In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one;

and take the helmet of salvation,

and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God."

Ephesians 6:13-17 (ESV)

Speaking Softly

Becky over at The Word of God and a Cup of Joe (one of my favorite blogs if you haven't guessed already) posted today on how God uses music to speak to us. That got me thinking...

The other day, Jonah was doing something in the kitchen and Esther Grace was hanging off of me as usual. Jonah's been into the crashing, smashing, hi-ya!, blow 'em up kindof mood lately. I couldn't take it anymore! I could feel the tension in my just building and I was trying to keep it under control. Did you catch that? Me. No prayers. No verses in my mind. (Psalm 119:11) Just me. You can guess what happened next?

Yep. Lost it. Really lost it. He took off running to his room and slammed the door. His bed is his "quiet place" and I've noticed that when I sin against him, that's his refuge. (It's bad that I know this. It should tell you how flawed I am in my parenting.) I knew I'd gone overboard but I'm the Mom. He's got to learn to respect authority, right? I always have music playing in my kitchen and right at this point Watermark's "Who Am I?" was playing in the background.

Over time You've healed so much in me

And I am living proof

That although my darkest hour had come

Your light could still shine through.

And though at times it's just enough to cast

A shadow on the wall

Well, I am grateful that you shine your light on me at all

Who am I that You would love me so gently?

Who am I that You would recognize my name?

Lord, who am I that You would speak to me so softly?

Conversation with the Love most high...

Who am I?

Well, amazing grace how sweet the sound

That saved a wretch like me

I once was lost but now am found

Was blind but now I see

And the more I sing that sweet old song the more I understand

That I do not comprehend this love that's coming from Your hand.

Who am I that You would love me so gently?

Who am I that You would recognize my name?

Lord, who am I that You would speak to me so softly?

Conversation with the Love most high...

Who am I?

There's more but the chorus spoke the most to me. Discipline is love. (Proverbs 3:12, Hebrews 12:6) I've just been studying that in Isaiah 10. (I haven't mentioned Isaiah in a while. Had to throw him in!) My discipline of Jonah should be a picture of God's discipline of His people. That's my job as a parent: to make God real and relevant. My discipline should be consistent. It should be just, guiding him in the correct path. It should be gentle and loving. Yeah- ouch.

I went to his room, apologized, and asked for forgiveness. Because as a parent, I also model our relationship with the Lord. And when we sin, we must approach Him, repent, and ask for forgiveness. It's not a sign of weakness. It's a sign of growth.

How has God used music to speak to you? Any favorite artists or songs? I'm always looking for more to listen to!

A Pretty Red Bow

God is so neat. He never does anything like I quite expect or plan out but His version is so much better.

Last week around this time, I was praying so hard for assurance of my PawPaw's salvation. I just had to have a clear 'yes'. I wanted this package I had dreamed up, complete with a big red bow on the top. I never got that. But this week, I've got peace that passes all understanding. Not about whether or not PawPaw knew Jesus but that I serve a Sovereign Lord, in control of all things, and I don't have to know. It's okay. No matter what.

The funeral was awesome. The Marine Corps handled everything with full honors, complete with a 21 gun salute. (Well, 22. Skylar, my cousin's newborn, fired her own round in her diaper just to send PawPaw off with style. It was loud!) My Nana was so strong. My uncle was so strong. Gosh, all of us were pretty strong. The preacher who officiated the service did a wonderful job and gave God glory above all else. He weaved Scripture throughout the message that gave hope and reminded us of our heritage we've inherited through Jesus. He also talked about the heritage and legacy PawPaw left with his sons and grandchildren.

I do love being on this side of the funeral arrangements though. There's more peace. It's just brighter. God gave me a picture of the disciples and the three Marys after the Cross. No wonder they were in such a hurry to get to the tomb Sunday morning! They just wanted to be there. We just wanted to be together at that funeral home. But now that everything's over, we still just want to be together. But the setting's much different. Much more joyful. Last night, we had dinner brought by loving friends to my parent's house. There were babies running around everywhere, laughter around the table, with coffee and dessert to moan over. I'm glad that we're on this side of the funeral. I'm glad that we're on this side of the Cross.

I didn't get my pretty little package with the big red bow of PawPaw's salvation on top. Instead, I got an ice-cream sundae. Sundaes, with their gloopy and sticky goodness, are messier than packages, with their crisp and pristine edges. (Ask anyone who's ever taken a toddler to Bruster's!) But they're also so much sweeter. Mine came with all the fixin's.....Nana smiling as she played with Esther Grace, Jonah reenacting the ceremony with his cap-gun rifle and saying he wants to be a Marine (which will change next week when he's Buzz Lightyear for Halloween), my uncle and dad watching TV and talking in the yard about who knows what, my cousin and myself ganging up on my sister and giving her a hard time as usual,......family. And the cherry on top? His grace, His mercy, His peace, His Sovereign control of all things. That's better than any neatly wrapped package I could ever dream up.

"...Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is sacred to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength." Nehemiah 8:10

No Sweeter Word

Yesterday we had one of those mornings. Bible Study starts at 9:30 but we have to be there early so we usually head out of here around 8:20 or so. Not yesterday morning. It all started out fine. I got up and got myself ready before the kids were up. Around 7:40, I woke Jonah up and got him fed, bathed, and dressed. While we were brushing his teeth, we heard stirrings from the baby monitor. Esther Grace was up and Jonah was so upset. He loves to go into her room on these mornings and wake her up himself, usually with a song, dance and a smile. It makes him feel like such the big brother. This morning he was beside himself that he didn't get to exercise his authority over her and he was very clear that she was such a bad sister for waking herself up. I explained that he needed to have a loving heart. We've been talking about rejoicing with others and having a happy heart so I tried to explain that this was the perfect opportunity to celebrate with Sister instead of the obvious route we were going.

     "Yay! Esther Grace is so BIG! She woke up all by herself! Isn't that wonderful??!!!!!" (I may have thrown in a little leprechaun-like leap and a few jumping jacks for good measure.)
     "No, it is NOT wonderful, Mommy! That is MY job. I'M supposed to wake her up. Her's being a BAD girl. Bad! Bad! Bad!" I knew I had to intervene quickly.
     "Okay, Jo. Here's the deal. Gracie's getting up and I'm sorry that you didn't get to wake her but that's just the way it happens sometimes. So-we're going to put a smile on our face, a song in our heart, and be happy this morning, okay?" All I got was a pout. I started to brush my teeth and Jonah disappeared on a mission to retrieve his shoes from somewhere in his room.

Then, I heard him on the baby monitor. It didn't sound good.
That was definitely a yelp.
Followed by a full-fledged holler.
Okay-that's crying.
Great.

He came back like everything was completely normal.
"Jonah, did you hit your sister?"
"Oh, no. Her just hit herself." Riiiiight.
"Jonah, did you hit your sister?"
"No." (Shrug.) "I don't know why her would do that but her just went -boomp- and hit her head."
"Jonah. Did. You. Hit. Your. Sister."
"Sooooorrrrrryyyyyy."
UUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!

Later, I found out that he actually hit her with a closed fist right in the middle of her forehead. (There wasn't a mark so either he didn't hit her all that hard or his arm was just too short to reach her all the way in her crib.) Needless to say, he got FOUR spankings. Two for hitting and two for lying about it. FOUR! All before 8:00 in the morning! I should've known this was the way the morning was going to go. We're studying Isaiah and that particular week's lesson was on Isaiah 5. A huge time-out for Israel. Really bad spankings from God for His disobedient children.

"Then he looked for a crop of good grapes, but it yielded only bad fruit." Isaiah 5:2b

That evening, I was telling Bear about it and Jonah walked in on our conversation. (I try not to tell these stories in front of him because I don't want him to think that we're bragging about his misbehavior. That and sometimes they're really funny and I don't want him to see us laughing about it.) He stopped when he realized what we were talking about.
     "No. Don't say that Mommy. Don't say that to Daddy. I don't want you to talk about it to him." Bear interjected,
     "It's good to be ashamed of our sin, isn't it Buddy? I'm glad that you feel sorry for your sin. That means that you know it's wrong." I added,
     "You know what makes it better. It's when we learn from our sin and choose to follow God's Ways because His Ways are so much easier and better!"
Jonah nodded in agreement, a smile beginning to appear on his little face.
     "And you know what's the best Buddy?" Bear said.
     "What Daddy?"
     "That we're forgiven."

Forgiven.

There are four main Greek words used for 'forgiven' in the New Testament but here are my two favorite.

charizomai meaning "to release a person from the obligation of repaying what is owed" derived from "charis" which means "God's freely given grace"

apoluo meaning "set free, release, pardon a prisoner, release a debtor, to remove the guilt resulting from wrongdoing"

Anyone need release? Need to be set free? Need some guilt removed? I'm right there with you.

"This is the covenant I will make with them after that time, says the Lord. I will put my laws in their hearts, and I will write them on their minds. Then he adds: Their sins and lawless acts I will remember no more. And where these have been forgiven, there is no longer any sacrifice for sin. Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching." Hebrews 10:16-25

Forgiven.

I can't think of a sweeter word.

A Night in Catholic Country

[Please know my heart regarding this post. It is in no way intended to be judgmental or accusatory. In fact, it is tattling on my own judgmental attitude. I apologize if it seems so. That is not my intention whatsoever.]

Saturday, we celebrated Bear's grandparents' 54th wedding anniversary. Well, technically we were celebrating their 50th anniversary 4 years late. It was held at St. Thomas Aquinas in Roswell. Did I mention the whole family is Catholic? I'm pretty sure Bear and I were the only Protestants there. They renewed their vows in the middle of the mass. I was a bit nervous about the mass because I had no idea what to expect. I've never been to a Catholic mass and have only attended one Catholic wedding (Bear's brother's) and one Catholic funeral (Bear's aunt's). I knew that there would be a lot of standing, sitting, and recitation by the congregation. Bear completely left me hanging and skipped the service altogether. Granted it was for a noble cause, seeing as they needed help in the kitchen preparing for the reception afterwards, but I was still a bit bitter. I sat by Bear's aunt, Leslie, who was very helpful in explaining everything. I would've been completely lost without her! They really should have cheat sheets printed up for visitors.

The mass started off with a hymn. (Is that what they call it?) The chorus said, "If you hear the Word of God today, do not harden your hearts." Um, was this picked out especially for me? I usually don't like 'different'. I'm pretty skeptical of all things unknown and this was definitely out of the familiar for me. Looking back on the evening, I probably did have some walls built up around my heart before going into it all. I mean, you're talking to a girl who doesn't even like to sit on a different row than her own at church. (Although, I'm pretty sure that particular row that I'm fond of doesn't have my name on it. Maybe I should contact someone at church about that....) I took a deep breath. Okay, God- I know you want me to hear from You tonight. Help me see You in this because You are here.

The priest?...minister?...deacon?...walked around the altar with a large rectangular plaque held above his head. (Maybe I should've cleared up some details before posting this!) I later discovered that this wasn't a plaque but a book. And not just any book but one of the Gospels. I should've guessed. It had four winged characters on it: a lion, an ox, a man, and an eagle. Duh.
Lion=Matthew, shows Jesus as King
Ox=Mark, shows Jesus as Servant
Man=Luke, shows Jesus as human
Eagle=John, shows Jesus as Divine
I knew all that Bible study would come in handy! This particular one was Luke. Before reading, they walked around the altar and said a prayer. Then, they did something that I thought was the most beautiful thing.

I'm familiar with the Sign of the Cross, where one makes the cross across one's body before and after prayer. This was similar but different. The priest made a small cross across his forehead, mouth, and lips before reading the Scripture. I found out later from my sister-in-law that they whisper "May the Word of God be on my mind, my lips, and my heart."

Oh, yes Lord! That is what I want! Not just for Your Word to be in my mind as knowledge. While I could definitely stand to memorize Scripture more, I don't want it to just be head knowledge but apply it to my heart as well that I may live it out. I also want Your Word on my lips, Lord. If I know it and apply it, what is it worth if I don't tell others about You? That's the core to my Christianity. Know it. Apply it. Live it out. Yes!

We've been studying the Beatitudes in Matthew 5 as a youth group. My lesson on Sunday was on Matthew 5:8- "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God." If I hadn't cleansed my heart of my bitter attitude when God called me to during that first hymn in that mass, I would've never seen Him in the service. Aside from getting the most cardio I've had in a while, all I would have seen is 'different'. The way they prayed was different. They way they worshipped was different. They way they sang was different. I wouldn't have seen Him and His message for me. Oh, that I would see Him wherever He is! That my own prideful arrogance never get in the way of His message for me! People are different but His Word is the same. "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and  today and forever." "In the beginning you laid the foundations of the earth, and the heavens are the word of your hands. They will perish, but you remain...But you remain the same, and your years will never end." (Hebrews 13:8; Psalm 102:25-27)

I've been studying Psalm 19 with a blogging friend and the final verse of the chapter is "Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer." That is my prayer for this blog. That is my prayer for my life. That God's Word not only be in my mind and heart, but on my lips as well.

It's Strictly a Parenting Issue

Okay, so I'm seeing a trend among Jonah's friends. First, there's Carter and his humble attitude. :) Bless him. He's such a sweet boy.

There's also Charlie, Jonah's cousin. I was talking to "Aunt B" (Brooke, my sister-in-law and mother to Charlie) about the kids a few weeks ago. She actually has two babies, well- they're almost 4. Charlie & Sarah are fraternal twins and are quite full of personality...in a good way, mind you.

Don't you just love the boots with the dress? She is a fashion connoisseur, let me tell you!

"Bant B", as Jonah calls her, was sharing how her two were at the playground and there was a tunnel slide. Sarah climbed up on top of the slide while Charlie crawled into the opening at the bottom. Then, Charlie proceeds to jump out of the opening with arms raised and shouted, "I AM RISEN!!!" Is that not precious?! Apparently, he was Jesus and Sarah was the angel at the tomb.

To go along with this pattern of Bible interpretation and application, Jonah came home from preschool the other day with a chapel story. Did you know that Abraham was running away from his "emenies", the Ammorites, when God told him to go to Nineveh? Yes, and when Abraham heard that he decided that he didn't want to go and so he ran away from God. But he didn't get far because there was a big sea in his way. So guess what he did? He stuck his big stick in the sand and God parted the water and they all walked across on dry land! Somehow, later on in the day, he added chains, jail, and a prison break to the story; however, Paul and Silas were nowhere to be found. Hmmmmmmm......let's hope he doesn't make a career out of writing commentaries!

I have no idea what version of the Bible Jonah's reading. And what is it with these boys wanting to be Divine? I'll tell you what I think. It's strictly a parenting issue.

Most boys their age emulate superheroes or run around playing good guy vs. bad guy. These three? They pretend to be the Ultimate Superhero. I mean, come on. What superpower is better than being risen from the dead? How do they know these things? Because their parents are teaching them God's Truth. Granted, things can get a little skewed...Abraham? Red Sea? Ammorites? Yeah. But what these young ones understand is that there is a God Who is All-Powerful and in control. He Alone holds the world in place and it is safe to trust Him with everything. They know that there are heroes of the faith (Hebrews 11-12) and they want to be a part of that Hall of Fame!

I read something very powerful in my Bible study notes the other day: "What we believe about God determines what we believe about ourselves, our world, our purposes, and our lives. What we believe determines how we behave." Yes. Even on the playground.

Oh, Lord- that I would be as bold as these toddlers! To live out my faith so unashamedly! What a blessing.

Thank you Ryan, Kelli, Russell, and Brooke for teaching your babies what really matters despite what this world may say. You embrace Matthew 19:14 wholeheartedly- "Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." You bring your children to Him everyday and by your example, encourage me to do the same. It's hard to inspire strength mixed with humility in a little fella, boldness seasoned with grace in a baby girl. But we have to do it because we're called to.

"These are the commands, decrees and laws the LORD your God directed me to teach you to observe in the land that you are crossing the Jordan to possess, so that you, your children and their children after them may fear the LORD your God as long as you live by keeping all his decrees and commands that I give you, and so that you may enjoy long life....Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up." Deuteronomy 6:1-2, 5-7

So thanks for your support and encouragement guys! (And if you find a Cliffs Notes on the Holy Bible, could you send it my way? I'm thinking we need a refresher course on the whole Old Testament.)

Did I Really Sign Up for This?

Yesterday I had my BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) Workshop. This is to kick off the new year of study. Yesterday's was particularly exciting because we begin a brand new study of Isaiah this year. It's never been done before by the BSF organization. Along with the new study comes some new guidelines and procedures. It's all very encouraging and thrilling. (I think I also love each new year because I'm truly a geek at heart and love all the office supplies that come with studying the Word! I always stock up on Sharpies, Post-Its, highlighters, etc. for the year.) Anyways, during our Workshop the leaders had to answer what we wanted God to do for us, through us, and in us this year as we study Isaiah. Well, since everything had been so new all day my mind automatically went to Isaiah 43:18-19:

"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland."

I want God to do a new thing in me! Everything else is new....Esther Grace has started showing her personality and WOW! She's a new thing! I'm going to have to parent differently with her and learn new things. Jonah's a new pre-schooler now. I want a new adventure with God, a new journey. I want excitement, thrill, a new revelation, a fresh anointing. "Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me." (Psalm 51:12) Little did I know what would confront me when I got home.

I was putting Jonah down for a nap when Bear came in from work.

"I brought a guest home."

By the way he said it, I just knew some huge snake or possum from the side of the road was waiting for me in the foyer.

"Is it a what or a who?" I asked.

He just grinned and led me through the hallway to a small statured man who was wearing glasses and standing in the middle of my living room.

"This is Jörg." (The best way we could ever pronounce it was George but that wasn't even it. It sounds kind of like Yurg.)

Apparently, my husband had picked up this man from the side of the road in downtown Atlanta. Jörg had flown into Atlanta on Monday and was backpacking through America for the next 3 months. No plan. No itinerary. Just him, a bicycle, and a backpack. My husband's dream. He had been standing on the side of the highway with his road map trying to decide where to go when a large truck rushed past him. The wind ripped his map out of his hands and into the traffic. The next person that talked to him was Bear Oh. And he would be staying with us for the night. WHAT?????!!!!!!

I panicked in my head. God, this is not a new thing. This is a crazy thing. This isn't an adventure, it's insanity. Didn't Elizabeth Smart get kidnapped by a homeless man that her dad employed? All these thoughts raced through my head as I extended my hand, smiled, and graciously said, "Hi. I'm Kristen."

I got to talk with Jörg all throughout the evening. He explained to me that his mother is a fan of "How you say, Old American Criminals." Huh?
"Like Kojak," he said. Gotcha.
That's how he improved his English. He bought her a set of DVD's for her birthday. He would watch them in English and then they would watch them together in German at night. I told him my favorite was Matlock. His mother is also a huge fan of "Gone with the Wind". Who's not? He said that he called her as soon as he got to Atlanta to tell her how disappointed he was.
"It's all gone. Nothing is left of the Old South," he sadly stated.
I told him of Madison and the legend of how Sherman left it intact on his march to the sea because of a lover who lived there. His eyes brightened as I explained that it was only about a 30 minute drive from our house. He said that he had read a lot on the 'Old South' before he left home and did desire to visit Savannah on his trip. Funny, I thought. We have several things in common. He shared pictures of his two daughters, 21 and 18, with us and laughed at our two little ones running around. He seemed very nice. Of course, I'm sure Ted Bundy did too.

The more he talked about his family, God began to do a work in my heart. I started to see him the way God sees him. He's just like me. He said that his 3 month journey in America was a spiritual one. He was looking for peace. He believes in God and says he obeys the 10 Commandments but doesn't believe in Jesus. 

Okay, God. So I'm in sheer panic mode on the inside but if my husband thinks this is a Divine appointment, I'm supposed to submit, right? I mean, that was in the vows somewhere I think. But I'm pretty sure it didn't include random strangers in our home. That part was definitely not in the vows. You know what echoed through my mind right then?  "The King will reply, "I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me." (Matthew 25:40) That was mixed in with a little of Hebrews 13:1-2, "Keep on loving each other as brothers. Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by doing so some people have entertained angels without knowing it." What else could I do?

So we all went to church together. Guess what the message was about? Isaiah 43:18-19 I'm not even kidding you. It was 80's Night for the youth, which I'm sure confused the heck out of Jörg. I tried to explain to him that we don't normally dress that way but I think something got lost in translation. He just nodded politely but I think this is the point when he started to think that he had been hijacked by serial killers. Especially when one of the boys walked in wearing a full fledged woman's leotard and started doing lunges down the aisle. The whole gist of the night was that everyone looked pretty silly dressed like the past and when we go back to our old ways of life after we accept Christ, we look pretty foolish. I mean, the whole point of this Christian life is to move forward.

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:12-14

You see, Jörg's past life was filled with sadness and despair. He lost his job working with Volkswagen when the financial crisis hit Germany and the banks refused to loan people money for new cars. He lost his house when he had no income to pay the mortgage. He lost his wife when everything was gone and she desired something more. Now he desires something more out of life, some could say a new thing, and has come here to America to find it. Jesus is it.

I'd like to say that he prayed to receive Christ right then and there. Honestly, I don't even know if he understood a single word. I do know that I prayed for him then and all through the night- every time I woke up to the sounds of what I thought was someone prowling around our house stealing every valuable we own. I wish I could tell you that I was victoriously bold and proclaimed Christ with every word I spoke. The truth is I put the kids in their jammies, put them in our bed, locked our bedroom door, and made Bear sleep on the couch to make sure our guest stayed put all night long. I completely fumbled through the whole thing. Maybe next time I will be more courageous. What am I saying? Next time?

This morning Bear took Jörg to Madison after a shower, a big breakfast, and a good night's sleep.

"For the record," I said as I passed Bear in the kitchen, "this doesn't happen again."

After about 5 minutes, he said,
"For the record, I heard you. If it really makes you that uncomfortable, it won't happen again."

For the record, I hope God heard that too.

Little Plastic Cups

Jonah attended "Camp Keeling" (although I think it should be renamed "Grammy Camp") at the beginning of the summer. Basically, he spent two days and one night with Grammy and Papa while Sarah and Charlie visited from Alabama. He had a blast! Not only does he love playing with his cousins but Grammy packs every minute full of fun and creativity. I'm talkin' painted t-shirts, homemade bird feeders, scavenger hunts (complete with toilet paper roll binoculars), flashlights and sleeping bags, cereal necklaces, coloring, cutting, pasting...you name it and she's got it. I'm surprised he didn't come home with a full ride to SCAD or at least threaten to quit all academic pursuits to abandon himself to a career in the arts or something. Anyways.....when he came home, he brought with him a little plastic cup filled to the brim with potting soil. I did my best to water and nurture that little thing but I have a confession to make.

We went to Mexico. In my defense, I left it outside so it could get rain while we were gone but apparently it didn't rain all that much in our absence. We had good intentions. It was to be a "Mammoth Sunflower" or so the seed packet said. We were going to let it grow in its safe little plastic cup until it was strong enough to transplant to the yard and then we were going to see if it grew taller than Jonah. Bless his heart. He was really looking forward to it.

Bear doesn't think it was really us being gone so much as the roots were all knotted up in a ball. I think it may have been ready to be moved out onto its own. We just didn't know it. We thought it needed to be stronger, bigger, older, healthier before putting it out there in the yard all by its little lonesome.

Early this morning our neighbor, Dan Gealy, went to be with Jesus. It was his second bout with cancer in the past year. He left behind a widow, a son in his senior year of high school, and a daughter in the tenth grade. I'm gonna be honest. I don't get it. Just at the time when you get to start being your kids' friend and not just a parent. Just at the time when your kids are old enough to do their own thing and you and your wife get some alone time again. Just at the time when you're pronounced cancer free and can take a breath.

Sometimes, God asks us to get out of our little plastic cup. He moves us into a big yard. The weather's harsher. The surroundings are unfamiliar. We don't get it and think it's too soon. We're not strong enough for this yet. But He puts us there with a purpose. To grow our roots deeper. To have our faith strengthened. To allow us room to grow into mammoth giants of faith. We can take hold of Him and His Word, allowing it to fertilize our hearts and minds, or we can dry up in refusal to be stretched beyond what we understand. But if we never get out of that little plastic cup, our growth just stops. Dies out. We get so knotted up underneath the surface of it all. It’s only when we’re given room to spread out with all our doubts and questions do we find stability in a Savior Who meets us at our deepest need. He becomes real to us and our faith increases exponentially.

2 Kings 19:30 says, "Once more a remnant of the house of Judah will take root below and bear fruit above". Lord, I want to take root here so I may bear fruit there! I want to be that remnant, God! In Luke 8, Jesus shared the parable of the four soils.

"A farmer went out to sow his seed. As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path; it was trampled on, and the birds of the air ate it up. Some fell on rock, and when it came up, the plants withered because they had no moisture. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up with it and choked the plants. Still other seed fell on good soil. It came up and yielded a crop, a hundred times more than was sown."

Oh, that my family would be good soil for the seed of Your Word. Protect Esther Grace and Jonah from being trampled. Give them godly friends, not thorns that would choke your word out of their lives. Keep me from being a thorn to others. May the Living Water of Jesus continuously replenish them as they grow in Your Truth, O Lord. May I mother them according to Your Ways and not my own so that they might produce a crop one hundred fold.

As for the Gealys, I pray Psalm 126:5-6 over Debbie, Brett, and Jordyn.

"Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy. He who goes out weeping, carrying seed to sow, will return with songs of joy, carrying sheaves with him."

May their promised harvest be soon, Lord.

Camp Cost 2010

Camp was UNBELIEVEABLE! I don't know why I expected any less. Maybe because I remembered my days as a youth and the drama that accompanies teenage girls but this past week sort of made me want to go back to high school. At least college. That very well could be the sleep deprivation talking.

God did a work in the hearts of the teens there and I pray He continues as they return to the "real world" once school starts. It's so hard to live it out in the valley once you've been to the mountain, you know? But that's life. I'm just so thankful that we're allowed those mountain top experiences here on Earth. I think it prepares us for Heaven. Although, I'm not sure if God allows drums quite like the ones I heard. Wow. I may need subtitles for the rest of my life. Interestingly enough everytime the band kicked up the volume, Esther Grace fell asleep. I asked if they had a CD I could buy to play in her room at night. I don't think they knew I was serious. I'm not sure if it was just sensory overload or if the vibrating furniture lulled her to sleep. The jury's still out on that one. Either way, she dozed throughout morning services just fine.

The week produced several revelations for me and Bear, which I'll probably recount throughout my blogging later, but one quite unexpected was that of a future worship leader.

I'm telling you, he loved every. single. minute. The bad thing is that now he thinks that he's 17 and doesn't understand why he can't take the car out to pick up "his boys". Jonah may need a good detoxing after an entire week spent with teens. The good thing is he saw boys he adores freely worship our Lord and it was sweet. An example was set for him to love God unashamedly and boldly not just by his parents, who now rank on the cool factor but not for long, but by boys he tries so hard to emulate. I'm so glad we took our kids. It was hard. It was exhausting. It was so rewarding.

"If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me and for the gospel will save it. What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul?"

Mark 8:34-36

Getting My Feet Wet

Church today was awesome. Have you ever felt like everything was geared just for you? It's a shame that everyone had to be there today just on my account because that's exactly how I felt. Recently there have been a few changes in my life regarding God and my service for Him. I've been at home with the youngsters for as long as I can remember. I've always served in the Preschool department no matter where I've attended. I even taught the little ones when I had a real job! Well, God has decided that I'm done there and has moved me to the youth. At first, I thought He was crazy. But then again, some would say that there's not much difference between the preschoolers and the youth. Anyone who's the mother of a teenager will testify to that. In all actuality, God had some pretty big changes in store for our church's preschool and children's ministries. He knew that I would not be able to handle these changes well if I was fully entrenched in the ministries so He moved me out early for my own protection. Isn't He amazing?! It's just this week that I've seen His guidance come full circle and I'm pretty awed by His love for me.

Today all started during worship. We were singing "Come Thou Fount", which I love but Bear says I just like the hymns because I'm old. Anyways, the phrase "tune my heart to sing thy praise" got to me today. Maybe because our new worship leader has a pink clippy thing that tunes his guitar. I don't know. I do know that my mind instantly started doing that Google thing where it runs in a million different directions that all are connected somehow. Think "6 Degrees of Separation" on steroids. I thought that guitars are usually tuned by either clipping the strings or twisting the knobs on the neck. Pianos are tuned by twisting the strings also. When I played trumpet, I used a stopper plug thingy in the end of it to alter the sound. Either way, usually when an instrument's tuned, there's some kind of twisting, clipping, plugging, pushing, pulling stuff going on. Isn't that just what the Lord does to us? He gets us out of our comfort zone and twists us so He can work. Sometimes it even takes me putting a plug in it long enough for Him to speak. And when I'm tuned to where He wants me, it always results in praise.

This week is also YOUTH CAMP!!!!! Yes, I will be attending with both my babies and TEACHING a breakout session to the middle school and high school girls. Good grief! Can you say "freaked out"?! Did I mention that Bear may or may not be there the whole week? What in the world?!

Well, in preparation for camp we talked about Joshua and the Israelites. In order to enter the Promised Land, they had to cross a river. At flood stage. With a million people or so. Yeah, okay. In Joshua 3:1-4, God tells the people to follow the ark, which represented His Presence among them. "Then you will know which way to go, since you have never been this way before" (Joshua 3:4). Um, okay God. Gotcha. I've been scared to death working with my group of girls. They are the sweetest things and so precious but it's just different and I've never been here before. Sound familiar? Okay, so He's got my back. But it's TOMORROW!!!!! I haven't even packed yet! And I'm taking my kids, Lord. Did You remember that or did You just think they could pack themselves? Then we got to verse 5: "Joshua told the people, "Consecrate yourselves, for tomorrow the LORD will do amazing things among you". Yep. Just for me. So tonight, I'm consecrating myself. Washing myself clean from all anxiety and doubt and ready for the Lord to do amazing things.

I ask for you to please pray for....

1. Obviously safety traveling and throughout the week as the kids will be playing paintball, white water rafting, etc. (John 17:15)
2. That while teaching, the words coming out of my mouth will be His and not my own. (Isaiah 51:16) Bear's also teaching breakout sessions at the beginning of the week so please pray for Him as well.
3. A long-suffering patience with my children. (Proverbs 14:29)
4. Nap time or some semblance of it somewhere during our day so evening worship isn't a bust. (I mean for my kids but I'll probably need one before the week's over!) (Proverbs 3:24)
5. The kids will be receptive to the Spirit and boldly act in obedience to His convictions. (2 Corinthians 9:13)

I think that covers it. I could list a million things really quickly but this post is already long enough! I'll try to post some pictures from camp if I can. Thank ya'll and remember us! :)

"Yet as soon as the priests who carried the ark reached the Jordan and their feet touched the water's edge, the water from upstream stopped flowing. It piled up in a heap a great distance away...The priests who carried the ark of the covenant of the LORD stood firm on dry ground in the middle of the Jordan, while all Israel passed by until the whole nation had completed the crossing on dry ground." Joshua 3:15-17